this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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