Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
