I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
