Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize