So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Randomize
