it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
