Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Randomize
