That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
