David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
My breasts were aching with rage.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
