so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
This is my life. Enjoy the view
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Randomize
