; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
