Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
