Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
