This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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