matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
