The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
