its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
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Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
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