So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
