They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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