Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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