I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
She said her name was "party"
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
