You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
