I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
