she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
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Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
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Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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