just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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