Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.

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(516): View more from New York

is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?

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(865): View more from Tennessee

that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested

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(812): View more from Indiana

The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.

(317): View more from Indiana

Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.

(812): View more from Indiana

Ah, my reputation precedes me.

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(214): View more from Texas

Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.

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(207): View more from Maine

Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now

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(519): View more from Ontario

like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you

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