im gay
i know
yea but for you.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
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i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
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