erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Randomize
