it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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