i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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