I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
