super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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