six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize