How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize
