dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
