Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize