so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
