no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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