Heybabeimwearingurpanties
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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