So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
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