Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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