I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
