So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
