"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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