my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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