I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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