My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
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