He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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