Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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