Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
