If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
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Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
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Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
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