I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
