fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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